Disjointed

I've been doing a little experimenting with dry point and drawing over the top of the prints. The idea seemed better in my head. I'll tip away at them slowly.

Next week I have my surgery, a mastectomy. It's going to be a big upheaval. I'm not worried about the surgery but more the after. I hope it doesn't knock me sideways and I'll be back on my feet quickly.  

It's going to be strange but if I can get through loosing my hair, having it all fall out in clumps I, sure I can manage this. Lets hope they don't find cancer and the chemo has gotten rid of everything. 

A Bit Different

 Some new drawings that I have been tipping away at. Trying to be relaxed as possible and just going with the flow. I have been really fighting with myself, body and mind when It comes to drawing so just trying to give myself a break. What I would like to do with these is transfer them onto fabric and go over them with stitch. I am in such a panic to get as much work done as possible and I have so many little projects that need completing, its a constant battle. I'm up against my own body, other responsibilities and Dr appointments. Soon it will be surgery time and I worry that's going to floor me, especially as it will be on my drawing side. I just have to keep going, and not hit a wall.

New Drawings

Roosters Song, mono-print with gouache and pencil

Untitled, pencil with gold leaf

 Just finished the Roosters song drawing above. not sure how happy I am with it. been struggling with my drawing and finding inspiration. I need to get out more maybe. Finding the act of drawing hard and not liking my painting/colouring or compositions. Its difficult. Wondering what the hell I'm doing half the time. What its all for, what am i supposed to be working towards besides the cheap high I get from the few likes on Instagram. It has to lead up to some sort of acknowledgement from the art world at some point, some sort of an exhibition. I'm sure it will work out.

Yesterday was my last day of chemo. Six rounds done and dusted. Just need to get over the sickness this round will cause and its onto surgery then radiation. The ride isnt over for another year. Another year of medication to keep the cancer at bay, every 3 weeks. The consultant says there is no reason why I cant have a normal life, but it will still be hard having it hanging over me. What is normal anyway?

It has to be done.

My journey to MidJourney

I'm very interested in this #midjourney app. I spent an afternoon telling it stories about dreaming of fancy pigeons and finches and so forth and this was the best image it came up with. I loved it. I love the abnormalities and the colours. I was very much against the AI apps when people were making the self portraits that were just nocking off digital artists styles. But after seeing artist who are using #midjourney in the paid app,creating their own style to fit their work I have become very interested. Especially for those bad pain days, days of nausea and fatigue when you just can't manage the studio. It could come in handy as a sort of sketchbook or extention of ones work and thoughts. 

So maybe I will jump on the band wagon but only if I can make it work for me. We are always learning and growing as artists. There's no harm in that.

As they say, watch this space...

With the Birds

'With the Birds,' 2022 mixed-media drawing 

I started this drawing while during my first round of chemo. Sitting here now I am not sure how I could complete anything, let alone a small drawing. I did my best to finish it yesterday despite feeling rough from treatment.  I am determined to keep going with my work. Taking the good with the bad.

Hopefully I can kep this up.

Art keeps me going

 Things are kind of tough at the moment. Life is changing fast and I have no control over it. 

It's tough but I'll keep going. Have to.

Appointments. It's exhausting 

Art and the animals keep me going, keep me grounded. 

Amazon, 2022, mixed-media sculpture

Amazon, 2022, mixed media

detail

detail

detail

 Amazon is a new sculpture that I have been working on and off for a while now. It seemed to change as life threw its little life changing hurdles at me and this piece reflects that.

It is made up of a large goose egg, from one of my own geese, which has been, pierced, stitched, and wrapped. A piece of a snail shell representing a breast pokes out of the wrapping of the figure. 

She is balanced precariously on the narrow part of the egg, braced for a fall. Gently placed on a piece of plated sinew which sits atop a wooden base.

The face of the sculpture is ceramic. Specifically it has been pit-fired and polished with bees wax. She is almost balding but the illusion of hair is created by again wrapping her face with plated sinew. Wrapped in a false comfort.

The Amazon women of history would cut off a breast to make them better archers, better warriors, to take lives.

Now as women in some cases we have to have our breast or breasts cut off to save our own lives, this is the new Amazon.